I can't help him to change...

We are often inclined to help others even (or especially) when they haven't asked us for anything.

Why do we do this?

Probably our altruistic side 😀

And then, it's easier to change others than to change ourselves.

The reality. You can only help someone who has decided to improve himself.

Anything else is a source of frustration for both parties.

So what to do?

1. When you get the urge to give advice.

2. Hold back.

3. Give it only if asked.

4. Or even better, replace the advice with a question.

What led you to this thought?

What areas of improvement do you see?

5. This is much harder, but as often happens, much more effective.