If I were an asshole, I would...
Thanks to @lovingkindnesscomedy for the idea!
1. Be angry with children and animals and scold them
2. Request revisions whenever I hire freelancers
3. Throw my trash in the street when no one is looking
4. Become a pimp
because it offers good ROI
5. Spread conspiracy theories
just for the entertainment value
6. Be right at all costs
7. Mock other people whenever there is an opportunity
8. Tell beggars to get a job
9. Tell people who are obese to eat less
because they don't already know that
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