Invent 10 New Unconventional, Possibly Ridiculous Jobs

As if following the circus parade, this person sweeps up all the manure left behind after politicians pass.

After the street sweeper goes by on asphalt roads, this person, armed with a battery operated blow dryer and a toothbrush, gets all the crud stuck between the tiny gaps in the asphalt.

Collects empty toilet paper rolls and repurposes them as furniture, children's toys, and automobiles.

Based on the old saying "last one in is a rotten egg" this valuable volunteer waits behind to make sure everybody else is "in" without having to hurry or if they have a disability which would otherwise prevent them from getting "in" other than last.

Checks cars in a parking lot to find stones stuck in the tread, and safely removes them.

Armed with a powerful laser, cuts and removes the part of a car parked in two spaces so it is only in one space.

Why rely on the factory to tear up those new jeans? These people will swing by your house with a razor blade and a strong sense of style, and slice 'em to bits.

Can't be ridiculous without at least one Monty Python reference.

Got an unwanted sales or "your Windows are sending signals" robo-call? Dial *FU and the call gets instantly transferred to a trained RoboCall Responder, tasked with stringing the caller along for as long as possible, wasting the caller's time and not yours.

Responsible for matching lids to containers and stacking them in some sort of organized fashion in your cabinet, at least once daily. And not just jamming the things in there, or leaving them on the counter for days, expecting me to do them. [Not venting at all... :)]