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Learn to Die so that you Live

I break down a quote by Paulo Coelho

    1. “Once upon a time, there was a bird. He was adorned with two perfect wings and with glossy, colorful, marvelous feathers.

    The bird was perfect without any human interference. It was paradise.

    2. One day, a woman saw this bird and fell in love with him.

    What the woman called love was anything but love. It's a bargaining agreement. 
    She was more concerned about what the bird had to offer her not what gifts she could offer to the bird.

    3. She invited the bird to fly with her, and the two traveled across the sky in perfect harmony.

    She invited the bird, the bird didn't invite her. She initiated the conversation.
    In the beginning, there was perfect harmony between the two of them. Freedom.

    4. She admired and venerated and celebrated that bird.

    Admiration and adornment isn't what the bird wanted at all. He was content soaring the sky.
    She projected her own insecurities onto the bird.

    5. But then she thought: He might want to visit far-off mountains!

    Fear sets in as it always does in these special relationships.
    There's a strong need for the woman to control, possess, and own the bird. 
    She wants to take away his freedom and the bird doesn't even suspect that the woman has already set a trap for him.
    The woman's demeanor has changed from that of love to fear.

    6. And she was afraid, afraid that she would never feel the same way about any other bird.

    She's chopping at the branches when it's her root thinking that's in need of an overhaul.
    The woman's erroneous thinking has absolutely nothing to do with the bird. Her story about the bird is completely fabricated.

    7. And she thought: “I’m going to set a trap. The next time the bird appears, he will never leave again.”

    The bird will never leave again. Is that true? 
    The woman never considers the long-range effect of her actions.
    Is that what she really wants -- for the bird to never leave his cage? 
    Does she want the bird to abandon his "birdness" for her own satisfaction and pleasure?

    8. The bird, who was also in love, returned the following day, fell into the trap and was put in a cage.

    The bird has no idea that he has become the object of the woman's desire.
    The unwritten of agreement based on freedom has suddenly changed to one of imprisonment.

    9. She looked at the bird every day. There he was, the object of her passion, and she showed him to her friends, who said: “Now you have everything you could possibly want.”

    If she had everything she wanted why is she still so unhappy?
    Doesn't the bird's happiness count for something too?

    10. However, a strange transformation began to take place: now that she had the bird and no longer needed to woo him, she began to lose interest.

    She treated the bird like a one-night stand. Once she got what she wanted her interest waned.

    11. The bird, unable to fly and express the true meaning of his life, began to waste away and his feathers to lose their gloss; .

    The caged bird's appearance began to resemble the attitude of his new owner.
    Life is a mirror.

    12. he grew ugly; and the woman no longer paid him any attention, except by feeding him and cleaning out his cage

    The onset of a downward spiral has begun from a seemingly irrelevant decision by this woman's choice to set a trap for the bird.

    13. One day, the bird died.

    The bird died so that he could live.
    Living in a cage when you were born to fly is death.
    Did the bird really die? 
    Did the bird "play dead" so that the woman would open the cage and he could once again fly amoungst the clouds?

    14. The woman felt terribly sad and spent all her time thinking about him.

    The source of the woman's pain didn't come from the present moment.
    She was sad because her time was spent thinking about what had already happened.
    She still did not see that even when she got what she thought she wanted she was still unhappy.

    15. But she did not remember the cage, she thought only of the day when she had seen him for the first time, flying contentedly amongst the clouds.

    Notice the insanity in her thinking mind.
    She had everything she wanted when the bird was flying contentedly amongst the clouds.
    And what did she do? She trapped the bird and took away the one thing which allowed them to travel across the sky in perfect harmony - freedom.

    16. If she had looked more deeply into herself, she would have realized that what had thrilled her about the bird was his freedom, the energy of his wings in motion, not his physical body.

    It's not about the body. 
    Focusing only on the body is a trap. The woman lost sight of what was most important to her and the bird.

    17. Without the bird, her life too lost all meaning, and Death came knocking at her door.

    The bird took the woman's life's meaning with him when he died.
    She gave away her power to be happy to a bird.

    18. “Why have you come?” she asked Death.

    When the meaning in her life was no more Death was inevitable.
    The woman's light, which used to burn so brigh,t is now just a flicker.

    19. "So that you can fly once more with him across the sky,” Death replied.

    Death is extending the opportunity for the woman to be happy once more.
    Her best thinking has lead her here. She needs a refresh.
    Her thinking needs to be born anew.
    Her desire to fly will never cease.

    20. “If you had allowed him to come and go, you would have loved and admired him ever more; alas, you now need me in order to find him again.”

    The woman must die to her need to own, possess, and control.
    She must die to her need for specialness.
    She must die to the belief that something outside of herself gives her life meaning.
    Don't Mess with Mother Nature.

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