Popeman and Choirboy - The comic
I bought myself a Notepd to rough out the whole story. I can then easily edit each bit before producing a second draft.
1. Page 1
2. Page 2
3. Page 3
4. Page 4
5. Page 5
Another homeless bum. This one is naked with long hair and a beard. And is enjoying his wine.
6. Page 6
He's hungry and ready to eat.
7. Page 7
The joke is meant to be that with clothes he looks like jesus. I also added that his drink is already finished before moving to the next page.
8. Page 8
He's getting angry over essentially nothing. Again dialogue needs work.
9. Page 9
Joke is that he can drink wine at the church. I get that the church drinks non alcoholic wine, but it's a joke it doesn't need to make that much sense, does it?
10. Page 10
He's now inside the church drinking and eventually falls asleep. This is all a lead up to what's happening next.
11. What do you think?
Remember this is really rough, but does it look promising? Do you have any advice for me going forward? Thanks.