The Feline Letters
Or: What my cat finds odd.
Loosely based on the Persian Letters by Charles de Montesquieu.
1. Sleep
Everyone knows that lack of sleep is harmful. You don't even sleep 15 hours a day. How is this supposed to work in the long run?
2. The Staring
You're always staring at those paper things that open and close and the glowing screen of the button thing on your lap. I checked and there's nothing.
3. Stress
Why all the stress and searching for things you can't find right now? Can't you just take it easy?
4. Loud Noises
I can understand it, because I also like to meow. But you make a lot of noise.
5. Walking on Your Back Legs
Granted, that's a nice trick, but it wouldn't be for me.
6. Eating Habits
It has been proven that you cannot eat fruit and vegetables!
7. Make a Living
How do you get your food if you never go hunting?
8. Being Bald
How did you guys lose all your hair?
9. Mice
How do you know you don't like them if you've never tried them? I will continue to put some on the doormat.
10. Laughing and Humor
Scary, repulsive and completely incomprehensible to me
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