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Bill Bergeman


Using If-Then-Rather Statements to Manage Common Stressful Situations

    1. Meetings.

    If I am stressed about an upcoming meeting, then I will write a list of ten things I can immediately execute to be prepared for the meeting, rather than freak out and complain to my co-workers.

    2. Social anxiety.

    If I am feeling anxious around people, then I will remind myself to focus on taking deep breaths, rather than be anti-social and get locked in a head full of negative thoughts.

    3. Traffic congestion.

    If I am stuck in terrible traffic, then I will play music that always relaxes me, rather than rage against everyone driving around me.

    4. Anger.

    If am getting angry with someone, then I will physically take a step back from the person to help gather my self-control, rather than getting confrontational.

    5. Death.

    If a loved one passes away, then I will focus on gratitude for knowing the person, rather than grief over losing the person.

    6. Money issues.

    If I am having money issues, then I will take a walk in nature, rather than stewing over a pile of bills at the kitchen table.

    7. Running out of time.

    If I am running out of time, then I will focus on what I accomplished and what more I can still do, rather than get upset with myself for not getting more done.

    8. Job loss.

    If I lose my job, then I will focus on being grateful for all the time I have to pursue new and better opportunities, rather than worry about how I'm going to pay the bills.

    9. Moving.

    If I am stressed about a move, then I will focus on what is wonderful about the place I'm moving to, rather than focus on what I'm losing and the hassle of the experience.

    10. End of a relationship.

    If a close relationship has ended, then I will focus on the great times with that person and the opportunity to meet new people, rather than focus on the loss of the relationship.

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