Which of The Five Love Languages Doesn’t Work for you? Explain why?
The 5 love languages relate to how people prefer you show your love for them. They are:
1 Physical Touch
2 Words of Affirmation
3 Quality Time
4 Receiving Gifts
5 Acts of Service
Being aware of the love languages of those close to you can improve your relationships, but it can be taxing to cater to people's love languages.
1. Physical Touch
The idea is that people who prefer touch as a love language feel more loved when they get hugs, kisses, or even massages.
But what if you hate physical touch? I do. I hate hugs, especially from strangers. I hate it when people kiss me on the cheek. It's not that I'm anti-social but physical touch makes me uncomfortable and anxious.
I don't know why that is but it's true for me so "physical touch" doesn't work for me as a love language. But it does work for many people and is probably one of the most important languages to use if you want to show someone you love them in a way they will understand best.
I think words of affirmation works better for me than physical touch (see below).
Another problem with using physical touch: it can backfire because then the person who loves words of affirmation might say, "Well, why didn't you give me a hug?" And now you have to explain why you didn't hug them when they wanted a hug and this can be painful.
So while physical touch might be good for some people, it doesn't always work well overall in relationships.
2. Words of Affirmation (aka "praise")
This means saying things like, "You look great," or "You did well on your test," or "I'm proud of you." It's also about listening intently and giving feedback about what someone has told you (e.g., "That must've been hard."), etc...
This is my #1 love language so I try to use this as much as possible with everyone close to me (although sometimes I forget). But if someone else's love language is words of affirmation and mine is acts of service then maybe we are not going to have the healthiest relationship because we are not communicating in each other's preferred ways. This is why knowing these things can help improve relationships but also can cause pain if one person feels like another isn't showing them enough love in their preferred way. So again, it can be taxing to figure out how to cater to all these different needs but once you figure it out, the relationships will probably be stronger than before because there won't be any confusion over which type of communication works best between two people who care about each other .ÃÂÃÂÃÂÃÂÃÂÃÂÃÂÃÂ
3. Quality Time / Acts of Service (tie) These are both about spending time together doing something enjoyable or doing chores together so that one person doesn't have all the burden while the other relaxes / takes time off from his/her respo
This was always my favorite thing growing up
hanging out with my parents on weekends while they did chores around our house together
It was an activity we all enjoyed and bonded us at the same time
But again , this only works if both parties feel comfortable with these activities
For instance , if quality time means going to movies together , then one person who hates movies might feel neglected during those times even though he/she might enjoy all their other quality time together in other activities
Or perhaps there was never any quality time spent doing chores together
Again , it's complicated but worth figuring out how everyone communicates their feelings best so there aren't any misunderstandings along the way
4. Receiving Gifts This means getting gifts or tokens of affection from someone close to you
Gifts don't have to be expensive although sometimes they are (e
, an engagement ring)
They just have to show that someone cares enough about another person that they took time and money out of their budget so that another person would