10 Strategies to Boost Mental Resilience
- The apology is final with no follow up
- You take full responsibility without excuses
- It is a way of getting instant closure and moving on
1. Learn to apologize well and do it.
"everything after the 'but' is BS". This takes practice. It is freeing for you and can be disarming for others who are not used to hearing good apologies.
Bad apology: "I'm sorry I'm late, but the traffic was terrible"
Good apology: "I'm sorry I'm late."
Also good: "I'm sorry I'm late. I will leave earlier next time."
This practice does a few things:
2. Don't complain
This is harder than it seems! If you catch yourself complaining, stop. This includes self criticism. A good book about this is A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted by Will Bowen
3. Get Good Sleep
Sleep helps you resist temptations/vices and give you the opportunity to be patient
4. Study stoicism: practice virtue
5. Tell the truth: all the time
You will have nothing to hide and nothing to keep straight.
6. Have a creative outlet that is just for you: don't judge yourself.
Write music, cook, make things.
7. Learn to be OK with imperfection or not knowing
I have found this with my hobbies: I am making some guitar stands this month. They are not perfect, but they are pretty good and I am learning. I am getting better at wood finishing.
8. Become a finisher
Do what you set out to do. This is easier when you do some of the other things on this list. For example, I said that I would write NotePd lists every day for a year. Some are very good, some suck. But I keep going.
You will learn something from every small task that you accomplish. Put out things that are not perfect. Very few things in life are excellent, but you will get better if you keep producing things.
9. Read. A lot. Mostly books.
This will build your "mental mulch." You will be more self-confident. You will understand references that other people make. You will have a deeper understanding of the world around you.
10. Get or stay reasonably physically fit
A balance of strength, flexibility and stamina. If you get to the point where you are not sore, stiff, or tired, you will have more mental reserves for your day. You don't have to be a gym rat to get benefits from slighly better health.