10 things about me but I'm lying

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1. I'm an astronaut

2. I'm a spy

3. I'm a world champion in karate + muay thai + sambo + scrabble

4. My dad can beat your dad

5. I can make a great coq-au-vin

6. Я говорю по-русски

7. I slept with the Princess of Luxembourg

8. I have killed 47 people

9. My best friend is an octopus

10. I know how to drive

:(