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10 Ways to Work on Forgiveness

I have heard that I need to work on forgiveness this past week. I am not sure how to do this when it all feels so real and deep. I did an AI James and searched online for some answers.

    1. What does forgiveness look like to you? - James AI

    "For instance, when I forgave my father for all the pain he caused me I felt relief and saw him as a sick man who was trying to figure out how to live his life but didn't know how because he grew up during the Great Depression and was abused by his parents. He tried so hard but couldn't do it. When I forgave him I saw him as a child and had compassion rather than anger toward him."- James AI

    I need to try and do this. See these people as children.

    2. Write a list of everything that person did for you.-James AI

    I think of this as a gratitude list. I have a lot of things to be grateful for with this person. The other people.. Not so much. I feel like they took a lot from me.. not intentionally but I feel like that makes it even worse in some ways. I will have to dig hard for this.

    3. Write a list of everything you did for them.-James AI

    I find this hard right now. I am surprised by this one actually. I feel like I haven't done anything for them. I've always felt like a burden to these people.

    4. How would life look different if you forgave? -James AI

    I think I would trust people more. I think I would be able to feel that other people appreciate me. That I add value to the people around me. When someone tells me I am good at something I find it hard to believe. I think it's the reason I give up so easily. I know that I am suppose to find my own appreciation for myself. I think I will be more free when I forgive. It's funny how my word of the year was "release".

    5. Confront them in a spiritual sense- Goop

    I think I need to have some sort of ritual where I forgive them. Something to do with candles. A bonfire. Burning of some sort of totem. I hold onto a lot of stuff physically. Maybe I need to burn that stuff. This reminds me of James getting rid of anything he owns. @JamesAltucher did that help you with releasing stuff that was weighing you down emotionally? I feel like yes but that was a bit ago.

    6. Immerse yourself in the anger/sadness -goop

    I have been doing this the past 3 days. I have thrown myself into the anger and then just cried and cried and cried. I think I need to do it more.

    7. Therapy- Me

    I have sat in therapy once a week for a long time. I talk about the surface level stuff. I feel the deep stuff coming up and this is the purpose of therapy. To get to the deep stuff.

    8. Write about it- Me

    Ive started. I write here because I feel like people can help or give me good suggestions. This feels like a safe space.

    9. Talk to Judy-Me

    Judy is my mediumship teacher. She also did a reading for me one time. She needs 6 months to pass. I wonder if it will help. I don't know.

    10. Get back into a routinely spiritual practice- Me

    I need to get back to meditation. I need to do weekly things to connect me with that sense of calm I get from spirituality.

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