15 insights that changed my perspective on life
- Fortune Telling: Projection
- All or Nothing Thinking
- Mental Filter: Picking a single negative detail. Dwell on it exclusively. Your vision becomes darkened like a drop of ink in water.
- Discounting the positive
- Jumping to conclusions
- Emotional Reasoning
- Should statements
- Personalization and blame
1. Cognitive Distortions - Negative Self Talk Externalized
A cognitive distortion is a distorted way of thinking. This could apply to yourself as well as to other toxic people.
Negative self-talk and cognitive errors are externalized in people's negative comments. Essentially, they have psychological projections about aspects of themselves that they dislike. Therefore, they project these negative comments onto others.
2. Recognizing logical fallacies/rhetoric from reasoning and objective knowledge
People use fallacies intentionally or unintentionally to persuade others. Flowery, grandiose words, metaphors, and analogies. Engage your emotions or values. They say outrageous things and then complement them with commonly accepted wisdom (anchoring).
Use critical thinking to see behind their hype.
3. Write down things you are grateful
We tend to see life in negative ways. But things are not necessarily good or bad, but how we perceive them to be. So just like the idea muscle, you have to strengthen your gratitude muscle.
Write three things you are grateful for every day.
Don't allow any one thing to drive you down. We are all more than the sum of our parts, and because we may not be great in one area of our lives does not mean we are bad overall or, worse, worthless.
Life can have a succession of failures, but don't fixate on a single failure because otherwise, you might miss out on the entire masterpiece.
5. Being assertive
When you don't challenge harmful behaviour, you're preserving your feelings to avoid discomfort and discord. It's possible to be disagreeable without being rude.
6. The cavalry is not coming to save you
When things don't go as planned, you're on your own. It simultaneously liberating and terrifying. Our judgments are our own, and we must see through the fog of the future, lighting it up with our vision.
7. Learn from complex topics from multiple sources
It's easy to blame yourself and just grapple with a complex topic for hours on end.
I think a lot of information is poorly explained and for that reason. You should look at multiple sources. Because somewhere, someone has presented it with perfect articulation and simplicity.
8. Don't neglect your physical health
There is a strong mind-body connection. Exercise impacts your intelligence. Your sleep impacts growth hormone and cortisol levels.
If nothing else is going well in your life, take care of your health.
9. Thoughts are not real
Think of thoughts as radio waves or background noise. Some thoughts are valuable and empowering, but most of the time they are background noise. You don't need to react to them.
10. Don't help people that don't want your help
We want to be saviours. We want to be helpful. But some people may not want our help, even though it might seem obvious they need it.
11. Manage your relationships
Remove 20% of the negative, emotionally draining people in your life. At the very least, draw boundaries around how much access they will have to your time and energy.
Find the top 20% of the people that empower you and spend more time with them.
12. Keep a lessons learned journal
Every time you make a major mistake in business or in life. Write it down and figure out what you should have done differently.
Review from time to time. And try not to make the same mistake again.
13. Be a big fish in a small pond
Find areas in your business and life where your skills will be complementary.
Being the technical person in a business-centric department. If you are a creative person, take that to a regimented department. Some of the most significant innovations have come from people outside the domain of expertise.
14. Take on projects other people are afraid to do
I received valuable advice from a previous mentor of mine. Most people avoid risk and don't want to damage their reputation by undertaking high-risk projects.
Go after what is challenging, and this will help you stand out from the crowd.
15. The Daily Practice
Physical ✨ Emotion ✨Mental ✨ Spiritual