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Don't Trust Your Gut - Seth Stephens - Davidowitz

After listning to this podcast i had to read the book.


    1. Intro

    In dating the best stratagy is to ask out lots of people.

    Be an extreme version of yourself. Lots of yes, lots of nos, very little meh

    Artists who present a wide range of work to a wide range of places do significantly better than those who don't

    Show up in a wide range of places

    Sports fans gain more pain from their teams losses than they gain pleasure from their wins

    Sales people with a poker face sell better than those with extreme emotions (anger, sadness, joy, ect).

    Sometimes to sell a product you should show less enthusiasm.

    People really like sentences that contain the word 'you'.

    People are drawn to self help more than they are drawn to helping the world.

    2. AI marrage

    Similarities, rather than differences, lead to attraction.

    A person who is happy outside their relationship is far more likely to be happy inside their relationship

    Trates least likely to lead to happiness - race, religion, height, occupation, physical attractiveness, previous marital status, sexual tastes, similarity to oneself

    In the dating market, people compete ferociously for mates with qualities that do not increase one's chances of romantic happiness.

    The data shows that single people are predictably tricked by shininess.

    People grow in attractiveness as we spend more time with them. (if we like them. Opposite is true if we dislike them).

    Tests -



    Focus on people with strong psychological traits.
    Don't focus on your similarities /differences. Focus on how happy you are together.

    3. Location, location, location

    Correlation doesn't imply causation

    Most of the decisions parents make, have little impact on who that child grows up to be.

    Neighbourhoods where children are raised make a much bigger difference in who that child becomes than other decisions parents make.

    Role models are the biggest indicator in who that child will become.

    4. Athletic greatness

    I'm not a sports fan, so this chapter didn't interest me much.

    5. Who is secretly rich

    When starting your own business

    Avoid these businesses - record store, arcade, hobby/toy/games store, bookstore, clothing, cosmetics

    Greatest no. Of millionaires - lessor of real estate, activities related to real estate, automobile dealers, offices of physicians, restaurants

    Lots fail in these businesses. Don't confuse this with businesses worth starting.

    Businesses worth starting - lessor in real estate, activities related to real estate, automobile dealers, other financial investment activities, independent artist/writer/performer, other professionals services, miscellaneous durable goods merchant wholesaler

    Big six - real estate, investing, auto dealership, independent creative, market research, middleman

    To consistently keep profits, a business owner must somehow avoid competitors undercutting them on prices until the profits disappear.

    Be insulated by law (Eg. get a patent, do something only you can do)
    Make your product extremely hard to copy, but easy to reproduce once made (a game, book, car, phone, ect.

    Build a brand people love.

    Learn to build apps. Hard to make great. Easyly reproduced once made.

    6. Success

    Spend many years building expertise and network while proving your Sucess in a field before striking out on your own in middle age.

    Entrepreneurs are roughly twice as likely to build an extremely successful company if they previously worked in that field before.

    People are more likely to laugh, when things are going well

    7. Hacking Luck

    Artists who produce more work tend to have more hits

    Extremely talented artists may find it easier to both produce a lot of work and produce great work.

    Put more work out there. Even if you think it's bad. Others may think differently.

    Don't pre reject yourself. Don't pre reject yourself. Don't pre reject your (it's important).

    8. Makeover:Nerd edition

    How you look has a massive impact on the quality of your life

    Presedential winners have a more competent face than their opponent.

    Army cadets Carrer success is largely based on how dominant they look.

    Small changes can make a 4 appear as a 7.

    Download faceapp. Play about with your appearance and ask people you can trust to rate what looks best (growing a beard, wearing glasses, new hairstyle /colour)

    9. The life changing magic of leaving your couch

    Duration Neglect : this bias means that, in judging the quality of a past experience, we fail to take into account how long that experience lasted.

    The peak end rule : we judge past experience not on the overall experience but on the peaks and lows of the experience and the end experience. If things aren't going well, end on a high, happy note and the bad experience will be lessened /forgotten.

    Top happiness activities - sex, theatre /dance /concert, exhibition /museum /library, sports /running /exercise, gardening, singing /performing, talking /socialising, bird watching, walking /hiking, hunting /fishing

    Do things that make people happier than they relise.

    Things that take energy, usally lead to more happiness.

    10. Misery

    People with big problems frequently don't socialise much : some don't even leave their house. The average person in your social circle is likely to be less messed up than the average person.

    If someone is annoying you. Imagine them as one of these messed up people. You might end up feeling sympathy instead of anger.

    The secret to happiness is focusing on the current moment. Meditation helps with this.

    Throughout the day ask yourself 'am I focusing on the current moment?'

    Listen to music and work with friends to make your job far less miserable.

    Social media makes us unhappy. Limit your time spend on it.

    Sports is more enjoyable when you're not invested in who wins.

    Alcahol makes things more enjoyable. Drink when doing boring things instead of already enjoyable moments in order to get the most happiness.

    Nature makes us happier. The seaside and sun makes us the most happy.

    11. Rocco's final thoughts

    I really enjoyed this book. First one on a while that I was eager to finish all of it. I highly recommend reading it.

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