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Marriage advice for a new husband?

This is a great Challenge!

    1. Don't listen to others

    Just always love starting out with this. Most advice is terrible. Sift through and find the 5% that might be good.

    2. Read this article from a Divorce Lawyer


    3. Communicate - A lot

    Like the article says above, you need to constantly be talking with your partner.

    You don't have to agree on everything, but you have to be on the same page. If you want to travel the world and your partner wants to stay in a small town and start a family, something has to give.

    Expectations need to be in line. Money expectations. Love expectations. Career. Family, etc.

    4. Don't communicate too much

    You don't have to tell your partner everything. For instance, there are only so many battles you should fight.

    Such as, if your partner is giving you concessions about moving somewhere, you might want to let them choose where they want to live in the new city. Or what kind of car to drive. You won't agree on everything, it's totally fine to defer on a lot of things. Even if you truly believe differently. If you don't care that much about a certain area, just agree with your partner.

    5. You will change

    And so will your partner. Your goals, ideas, etc. You have to constantly communicate these things.

    A strong partner will let you grow and you will let them grow.

    When/if you have kids together, things will change. Keep talking about it.

    6. Don't keep score

    Your partner did the dishes and the laundry. You mowed the lawn. Your partner takes out the trash. It's ok if you aren't pulling your full weight right now, just pick it up in other areas. Be attentive to them. Make up the slack elsewhere.

    Marriage isn't you vs. them. You are a team. Make sure the team is winning and keep communicating.

    7. Keep it fun

    Surprise them often. Not necessarily gifts (my family doesn't require gifts on birthdays or Christmas or whatever), but cook dinner when you aren't suppose to. Or schedule a trip, or go to an event your partner wanted to. Without them knowing.

    8. Take care of yourself

    Be your best self. If you are a slob, your partner isn't going to like the way you look much anymore. Be someone your partner is proud of. Be a good person. Keep striving to make the team better.

    9. Keep dating them

    When you weren't married you would take them out on dates. Do the same thing now. Even if you just bring sushi home and you eat it together on the porch with some wine. Or you watch a movie together certain nights. Whatever. Keep if fresh. Don't get complacent.

    10. Be their biggest supporter

    Be positive. Encourage them to go for the things they want to try or achieve. Sure, you can spell out some negative things, but overall, unless they are crazy, give them positive feedback.

    11. Give them freedom

    Make sure they have a life outside of your marriage. You too. They should have hobbies and friends outside the family. Encourage that. Alone time is needed. And humans want freedom.

    Good luck!

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