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Rocco's Jokes - Part 7

Even more of my funny, funny jokes.

    1. George Floyd

    Have you heard that George's family are now millionaire after getting compensation for their sons murder. Looks like they won't be going black to work. Sorry, back to work Floyd-ian slip.

    2. Mask

    I use to think there was nothing worse that wearing a mask outside. Turns out there is. Dying a slow and painful covid death.

    3. A fun lgbt observation

    Every time a new letter is added, the one before comes more social acceptable. Lesbians where treated like witches, until gays came along, then people where like 'Lesbians aren't that bad. Can't blame them for liking woman. Who doesn't?'. Gays where treated like scum. Until trans came about. Then people where like 'Gays aren't that bad, some people love the same sex, that's ok' Trans wasn't accepted until trans speces and the + came about 'You can be a man or a woman, but a cat? are you insane!' So if cat people want to be accepted, they just need to add a new letter and people will accept them and direct their hate on the new later.

    4. Feminism

    if you've been watching the news you have probably seen a lot of angry and upset woman and I know what your thinking 'well what's new there then hahaha!' which is disgusting and sexist, shame on you. Anyway what's happening now reminds me of the 1940's during WW2. There was a lot of angry and upset woman then, too. They had protests saying that the men shouldn't have to go to war. That nazis should be educated. If only we listened to them then and educated nazis, millions of lives would have been saved. So I'd like to take the woman's advice from today and educate men. Rapes bad, don't do it. Educated.

    5. Lazy

    Can you believe it? People where calling me, Rocco, lazy? Lazy! I'll show them who's lazy. Act... who am I kidding, I'll get someone else to do it.

    6. Iron

    A lot of people believe that irons are called irons ,because they're made from iron. You'd think that's true, but it's not. Irons are actually called irons, because you iron with them.

    7. Coughing fit

    My wee gran caught covid. She had a coughing fit earlier today. Now should she pass away, she's got a resting place tailor made just for her.

    8. Non binary

    I'm neither a man or a woman.

    What?

    Im non-binary

    Analogue

    Haha! don't be silly. I'm still human. A log, you're crazy

    9. Aeroplane

    I bought myself an aeroplane. Now I can eat very thinly sliced mint chocolate.

    10. Kids in cages

    I think we can all agree, regardless of your political opinions, that kids shouldn't be in cages. But they're their for a good reason, their there to keep them safe, until they can be returned home. So, how do we get the best of both worlds - No cages and safe kids? We get the kids to build their own cages. Not like slaves, for fun. And I know what you're thinking 'Why would they want to build cages?' they wouldn't , but they , like all kids, would love to build forts. Give them blankets, sofas, boxes etc. and they'll build their own. They'll be begging to stay in the camp. Non stop fun.

    11. Scooby Doo

    A lot of people ask me 'Rocco. How'd you become an alcoholic?' and im like 'That's a bit personal Ayn't it?', but truth is cartoons make me an alcoholic one in particular - Scooby Doo. And I know what your thinking 'Scooby doo doesn't have any alcohol in it' and I don't blame you for thinking that, but if you watch closely you'll find a lot of boos.

    12. Easy Smiles

    If you ever feel sad or depressed, just remember. One day, everyone you hate, will be dead.

    13. Hot Drink

    What hot beverage is never as bad as you think it will be? Anzi-Tea

    14. Dislexic Barber

    My wee brothers dyslexic, but he's never let that hold him back. He pushed through and became a barber. Always wanting to grow he bought a magazine and tried to learn from it. Unfortunately his dyslexia followed him. He read that to become a great barber you need to dye. So he did. RIP.

    15. Greetings

    16. Fun observation - Grandparents

    Have you noticed that different classes have different words for their grandparents. The upperclass call them grandfather and grandmother, middle-class call them grandma and grandpa, and the lower-class gran and pops. I think this is due to them being close to death and not wanting to pay for each individual letter on a wreath

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