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Ways to escape feeling of anxiety and looming fear

I'm about to be 34 years old and just moved back to my Mom's house. It feels pathetic. Why am I struggling to make money? I graduated with a PhD in a unique research area. But lately I've been hussling to get whitepaper gigs so I can send all my earnings to my wife who is stuck in Thailand. Going back to China for her is a $12,000 bill and uncertainty of if she can ever leave again.

Celsius may never give back my ether I deposited.

I need a job. Do I go apply for McDonald's? Or continue riding the wave of crypto gigs?

I took 2 steps back like Skip the Line talks about by writing show notes in return for Naavik Pro valued at $1000 month. But that can't pay my bills. Ugh

    1. Meditate with brain.fm for 15 minutes

    2. Call a friend

    Do I have real friends?

    3. Go to store and buy a gratitude journal and tackle some hard gratitude problems

    4. Drink water

    5. Read the final chapters of skip the line

    6. Go to gym no matter what

    7. Just focus on anything. Write a cubist Shakudo writeup

    8. Play my bros Nintendo switch

    9. Accept the fear and associate it to NOT doing the things on my schedule

    10. Lean into the fear and try becoming anti fragile. Say no to things I'm not curious about

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