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10 things I would not want you to do when you meet me

Original idea from @lovingkindnesscomedy.

10 things I would not want you to do when you meet me
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    1. Make comments about my horse's odd appearance

    2. Shoot at me

    or point a gun at my direction

    3. Expect me to speak fluent Chinese

    4. Take mind-altering drugs

    and don't offer me any

    5. Squeeze yourself under the brim of my hat for protection from sun or rain

    6. Expect me to convert to your religion

    7. Talk about teams from a sport that doesn't interest me

    For example Cricket, American Football or sack races

    8. Make suggestions as to how I could change my appearance to match your ideal

    9. Try to kidnap me

    10. Suddenly start applying paint to my body

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