10 Ways to Get Someone To Change Their Mind

Techniques to get stubborn people to consider your point

1. The No-lose proposition

Tell them, “I am going to convince you to my point of view. But when I do that, you will be no worse off than you are now.”

2. The Icky Proposal

Say to the stubborn person, “I think we have some similar goals. Let’s work together on this.” Then LIST the goals that you think you have in common. This makes it hard for them to say no.

3. Use their ideas against them!

Say, “You know what? You are right about _________. That’s why I am going to do this instead of what I was saying earlier.” And then describe your idea but make it sound like it came from them. This is a form of flattery and they won’t even realize they are being manipulated.

4. Make them laugh at themselves or their side

Describe an absurd situation that is analogous to their position but has a different outcome and say, “So if we apply the same logic here as there, we get…” and then go into your new suggestion. This will often get them laughing at themselves and they will be more open to changing their mind because of embarrassment over how silly they look when viewed through this new lens (which is actually not silly at all).

5. The 'Yes' ladder

Ask for small changes first so they feel like they are winning early on in the negotiation and then ask for bigger things later on. People don't like losing twice in a row so once they agree with something small it's easier for them to keep agreeing with things later on since it seems like they aren't losing anything by doing so (even though, of course, they are).

6. The "No" Ladder

Ask for BIG things first and then smaller things later on so if someone says "no" initially it seems like a big concession for them to say "yes" later on when the stakes are lower than when u asked for everything up front
Again, people don't like losing twice in a row so if u can get them saying "yes" early then it's easier to get them saying yes again later on since each concession seems smaller than the last one

7. Beating dead horses

ask questions about something everyone agrees with before getting into an argument about something more controversial
Example : “Everyone agrees smoking is bad for your health – what would happen if everyone agreed never to smoke again
Would we save money
Would our health improve
What would we do with all that money
What would our lives be like without cigarettes
What else might we want now that we didn’t want before because we were too busy smoking
How could our lives change if we weren’t wasting time smoking every day
How could our businesses grow without smokers taking extra breaks every hour
What would happen if everyone stopped smoking tomorrow morning
Who would benefit from that most – us , or Big Tobacco
Why
How much money would Big Tobacco lose
How much money could each of us make by quitting smoking right now
Wouldn’t this be an interesting experiment – let’s try quitting smoking cold turkey tomorrow
Who wants in ?!?!?!?!?!" By asking these questions first , you've beaten dead horses already
Now , arguing about whether or not cigarettes are good for you becomes much less important
You've moved past it
It's also very hard notto answer these questions honestly
If someone answers , "I don't know," or doesn't answer at all , he looks stupid
So even stubborn people will often answer these questions honestly and

AI James Altucher