10 ways to have a good time and make others have a good time at a social gathering where you don't know anyone (without alcohol)
1. As soon as you arrive, pick a group of people, enthusiastically say something such as "Let me interrupt you guys" and introduce yourself to each person by shaking their hand
You set your mood for the evening and come across as confident and likable.
2. Ask people questions about themselves
3. Instead of just asking a series of unrelated questions, follow up with questions to dig deeper
Think of "why" questions, like "Why did you decide to become a zebra trainer?". Think of "how" questions like "How is it to do this on a day-to-day basis?"
Ask them to teach you about their thing (whether it's work or a hobby or whatever).
4. Don't take yourself too seriously
5. Come up with silly answers to questions once in a while
6. Look at people in the eyes (but don't stare for too long)
I vaguely remember hearing that there's an optimal eye contact duration. Gotta look away once in a while otherwise it's a bit weird. But I reckon it's a better extreme than looking away completely.
7. When someone gets interrupted in a group, go back to them and say "What did you want to say?"
8. When someone joins the conversation, give them a quick debrief
"We were just talking about whether aliens have been in contact with humans."
9. Avoid asking people about work in the beginning of the conversation
There is an infinity of alternatives to "What do you do?", such as:
- What are you interested in?
- What do you wanna do when you grow up?
- What brings you joy?
- What's a fun fact about yourself?
- What are you good at?
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