Advice on asking a girl out on a date.
1. Since you already share some interests, ask her if she would like to accompany you to do something in that area. But be specific.
For example, a book signing, a concert, a new tech exhibit, etc.
2. For first dates, a more public venue will often feel safer.
3. If you have mutual friends, a group outing can be a nice place to start.
4. Don't ask her out on a date. Ask her permission for you to accompany her.
It seems like a small grammatical difference but can set a completely different tone.
5. When you do ask her to spend time with you, make it a small commitment.
The traditional dinner and a movie can be a minimum 3-4 hr. commitment. That can be too much for some. A cup of coffee or an hour attending a lecture together. Something like that. Make sure to leave your time afterward free. This way you are not rushed or worried and have lots of extra time. Your date may end up lasting a lot longer than planned.
6. When you ask her to spend time with you, let her choose the activity.
But have a plan already in your mind in case she turns the responsibility back to you.
7. It goes without saying, but she is your guest for the outing. Treat her that way.
8. I think everyone gets one do-over.
if you ask her to spend some time with you and she declines, be very respectful, and let her know that you forward to getting together in the future. After a reasonable length of time (for me its 2-4 weeks), let her know that you have been thinking of her and would still like to get together.
Likewise, when you are on your first "date", if it doesn't seem to be going well, it is OK to ask and see if she is enjoying herself or not. If not, recognize that fact and suggest that while this time didn't go well, perhaps we should try something different in the future.
9. Have confidence in yourself......
..but remember that you are lucky she decided to spend her time with you. It's a balance.
10. Don't try too hard.
Put some effort into your date. Your appearance, wardrobe, etc. This shows that you value her time, and this is important to you. But don't overdue. Be yourself.
11. Make sure you ask in person.
Yes, it can be scary and is hard. But phone, text, email, or anything else will not do.
12. Flowers do work.
Thank AI for this one. It seems very cliche' to me, but if you are meeting her at her home, bringing flowers is a classy move. Wine is also but has some risks involved. Know your audience.
13. Offer something of yourself
If you can cook, draw, paint, do home repairs, etc. ask her if she would enjoy that. Having someone take time and DO SOMETHING for YOU can be very appealing.
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