How to manage Self-expectations?
Our expectations for ourselves can push us to higher success or be our biggest trap.
It’s ONE of the biggest differences in the mindset between successful and unsuccessful people. And also how happy or unhappy one finds their selves at any particular point in time.
I still struggle with managing my expectations especially to myself.
7 ways to manage your Self-expectations
1. Self-Assess yourself by asking yourself why you want something
Simon Sinek wrote a powerful book that changed my thinking forever – "Start with why."
Without leading with why – we become slaves and victims to our expectations.
They control us for no reason.
This would help you know the real reason you hold a certain expectation and what it means to you.
Are you giving it more value than it holds? You gotta assess yourself.
2. Focus on what you have control over
For you to achieve any result – you need to differentiate between the things you have control over and those you don’t.
And the key to being successful and happy while working towards your goal is to focus on the things you have control over.
Focus on what you have control of = success and happiness
Focus on things you don’t have control over = pain and suffering.
3. Get your Priorities Right
It’s easy for others to tell you – you’re supposed to have had this degree, get this certain job, marry at a certain age, be this certain height, follow a particular diet, have a particular lifestye, talk a certain way etc.
But how much of what they say is part of your priorities at that moment.
Fact is if you don’t prioritize your life someone else will.
This is part of the first point which reminds you to know why you want a particular result. And setting your priorities would help you make sure it is aligned to your highest priorities.
Else don't be surprised if you're just aspiring for more emptiness and purposelessness to fulfill others desires .
4. Setting healthy expectations:
Everyone knows we should set BIG goals. But how do we prioritize our wellbeing to be in line with our expectations.
Be realistic in what you expect from yourself and others.
This can be hard but it takes grace to set BIG goals and make them sound realistic.
You just have to factor in your abilities and limitations while never allowing them hold you back.
5. Learning from past experiences:
Through past experiences we can predict what's likely to happen or not. But the key is to learn from our mistakes and making sure our expectations are realistic.
Set reasonable expectations for yourself going forward by drawing on your past experiences.
If you've made mistakes, take note of them and make an effort not to do so again.
6. Being flexible with your expectations:
Not everything you do would work out as planned.
Sometimes, if you just listen you can learn a lot from the universe. But it happens if only you pay attention.
Don't be too rigid with your expectations in life even to yourself.
Sometimes things don't go as planned, so be willing to adjust accordingly.
7. Keeping things in perspective:
Say you wanted to sleep 8 hours every night. You could control everything from your diet, exercise and supplements yet find yourself sleeping less or more on some days.
The reality is everyday may not give you equal results.
Don't let your self-expectations get too out of hand.
Remember that you're just one person and there are only so many hours in a day.
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