How to one up your life
I'm working on a year long Instagram. A new post each day. Below are some of the content of like to share. Hoping to start sharing in May.
1. F**k off!
How often do you have negative thoughts? I'm guessing more often than you'd like. We wouldn't let others talk to us that way, so why do we allow ourselves? Next time you notice one of these thought reply with 'Fuck off!' and replace it with the opposite though Eg. I'm stupid - Fuck off! - I'm a genuis. Both are untrue, but one leads to you feeling rubbish and one leads to you feeling good. Why would you choose to feel rubbish when it's just as easy to feel great?
2. Availability Cascade
What's repeated seems true. When we repeat negative thoughts we quickly come to believe them as true and act in accordance. When we repeat positive thoughts we soon believe them to be true and as a result of our actions, they soon become true. Pay attention to your repeated thoughts.
We only have control over two things. Our thoughts and our actions. Anything you want to achieve should start with these two things. Our thoughts influence our actions and our actions influence our thoughts. If you want to think better, try changing your actions (eat healthier, exercise, stand up straight with your shoulders back ect), and if you want to change your actions change your thoughts (think of the end result, rather than the process, think of the minimum you can do and do that, think positively). How does narrowing your focus down to two things make you feel?
4. I'm Awesome List
It's very easy to list all our supposed failures, yet it's rather difficult to remember our achievements, even though we all have plenty. Focusing on failure feels bad and often convinces us that we are a failure because of that. Being a failure is depressing, we convince ourselves that there's no point trying, because we're incapable of success. Avoiding these feelings is key and an easy way to do this is by writing down a list of all our achievements. Whenever you feel like a failure read and remind yourself that you're not. You've done great things, failures aren't capable of. You're a winner, don't forget that.
5. Make it easy
We all know what we need to do, but often the mear thought of doing it feels too much. As a result I recommend making it easy. If you need to eat healthier, don't buy in unhealthy foods. When it comes to dinner time cooking healthy will be easier than going to the shops, coming back home then cooking unhealthy. Going to the gym might be difficult, but having weights in your house makes that task a lot easier. We're lazy, use this to your advantage by making the tasks you want to do easier than the ones you don't want to do. How can you make what you want to do easier?
6. Thought Exercise
How often do you mind read? Really, how often do you you think 'they hate me, they think I'm stupid, they want to hurt me ect.?' probably more often than you first though. These mind readings make us feel bad and creates a devide between us and others. Instead I recommend thinking 'they love me, they think I'm Awesome, they like me, they're checking me out ect.' when walking by strangers. People you have no bias towards, but because you choose to think like this you'll feel great and you'll be much more likely to create stronger bonds with people as a result.
Meditate on how bad your life could be. Where are you? What are you wearing? What are you eating? What does it smell like? Really put yourself there. When you're finished look around and realise how lucky you are. Start giving thanks to a god, universe or just yourself for not being in that situation and for all you do have. When something good happens give thanks again. Being grateful will always make you happier. Thanking shows your appreciation. The more yoh do it the more you'll see to be thankful for.
8. Spread joy
Why do we buy others presents? Because seeing them smile fills us with joy. Make others happy and you'll feel happier as well. You don't need to buy anything, tell a joke, hug them, help them, play sports together. Who will you spread joy to today?
You're fat, you're ugly, you smell, you have a big nose. Chances are they didn't hurt you (sorry if they did). Yet these phrases have been blamed for a lot of hurt. What makes some people get hurt and others not? Permission. When you allow these words to hurt you, they will of you don't they won't. And the same goes for 'stronger' words. Racism, sexisim, homiphobia ect. Don't give them permission to hurt you, see the words for what they are, words. They're labels too, but why trust what they have attached to the label? What do they know? You know yourself better than anyone. If it's not true don't give it permission to get through.
10. Two futures
This exercise makes choices easier. Imagine the worst future. Everything you've worked for failed, everyone hates you. Your life is going nowhere. Now imagine the best future. What do you do for fun? Where do you stay? Who do you live with? What's a typical day like? Now you have a good picture of both futures make decisions based on moving you closer to the best future and if that's not possible, away from the worst future. We often make decisions based on what's good now. Looking further ahead allows us to live much happier lives. What future are your current actions leading you to?