If I opened a burger joint, these will be the burgers on the menu...

A flame-grilled veggie patty piled high and overflowing with lettuce, tomatoes, jalapeno peppers, pepper jack cheese, and grilled mushrooms. (inspired by my wife's tendency to add too much of a good thing)

A thick 0.666-pound burger topped with lettuce, tomato, goat cheese, pickles, and hot sauce. Served in a lettuce wrap "bun."

A quarter-pound burger with American cheese, two slices of bacon, and curly fries inside two sour cream doughnuts. A decadent mix of sweets and savories!

A juicy flame-grilled burger made with Carolina Reaper pepper flakes mixed in, topped with lettuce, tomato, thin habanero pepper slices, pepper jack cheese, and ghost pepper hot sauce. It's enough to make your head burst into flames.

A crispy sweet potato-breaded fried chicken thigh seasoned with marinated salty pepper salt, on a seared rice bun. (this one is inspired by Mos Burger's rice burger and my love of Taiwanese fried chicken)

A Kobe beef burger cooked in stout ale and topped with whiskey-infused bacon, topped with Swiss cheese, white wine-simmered mushrooms, and red wine sauce, on a brioche bun.

A crispy fried Atlantic cod filet topped with shoestring fries, tartar sauce, and fried onions on a buttered and toasted bun.

The "beef" patty is actually a mixture of 3-5 different ground meats. We won't tell you what meats are in there. It's served with the freshest toppings we have, but we also won't tell you what they are. We'll also give you a random bun and top the burger with our secret sauce.

A tender chuck roast beef steak topped with cheese, beef crumbles, and beef sauce, sandwiched between two quarter-pound beef patties.

A toasty bun stuffed with oh-so-good nothingness. Your taste buds will revel in the non-existent flavors that test the bounds of your imagination. Only 140 calories!