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Invent 10 New Unconventional, Possibly Ridiculous Jobs.

Invent 10 New Unconventional, Possibly Ridiculous Jobs.

    1. Professional heckler

    2. Cuteness performer

    Like a stand up comedian, but instead of making people laugh, they make them go "awwwwww!"

    3. Professional annoyer

    Someone very annoying that you hire so they can follow you around so you can train yourself to be comfortable with annoying things. Or that you hire to befriend someone else as a way to make them have a terrible time.

    4. Moderator for debates between friends

    I've been wanting to do this. You're having a heated argument about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and you're both way too emotional and biased. You decide to call a freelance moderator to calm things down and make the debate more productive.

    5. Fake mafia guy

    A friend told me a story about a guy who got scammed by a car mechanic. His Russian friends came to the car mechanic's home (or workplace, can't remember) and implied that they were from the Russian mafia (I don't think they explicitly said it, but they probably said a few things that sounded threatening in a thick Russian accent). They had one hand in their jacket as if they were hiding a gun. The scammer immediately gave the money back.

    6. Coach for people who are anxious about board games

    7. A service that makes you go live an entirely different life for a week, a month or a year

    They would make you abandon your whole life for a set period of time (it shouldn't be a secret, you shouldn't be reported missing, you can just tell people what you're going to do or you just say you're going on a long vacation). They fly you somewhere, give you a job, some friends, maybe even a family, a hobby, etc. A whole identity.

    Maybe you can switch lives with another person. Maybe this is a thing? I remember this happened in a Simpsons episode about reality TV.

    8. Pseudocide facilitator

    Similar, but more extreme and likely illegal. This job would consist of helping someone fake their own death. This might already exist in one form or another on the dark web.

    9. Comfort zone-breaking facilitator

    This job would consist of helping someone get out of their comfort zone. This probably exists, but I'm picturing a whole service that makes you go do crazy stuff for a whole year or something. They pick everything for you, and you just have to do it. Skydiving, week-long intense martial arts workshop, week-long wilderness survival, etc.

    You'd need to have a flexible profession to have the freedom to do everything. Or the facilitator would have access to your schedule and tell you when you have to be free, but I think it would be better if they just take you out of your home suddenly without warning and send you to Lapland to be a christmas elf or something. Or you'd take a whole year off.

    10. Conlang creation coach

    Conlangs refer to constructed languages: "a language, such as Esperanto, that has been artificially created rather than having evolved naturally through use." (definition from Oxford Languages)

    Some conlangs were created in the context of a fictional work (such as Klingon in Star Trek, or the languages from The Lord of the Rings and from Game of Thrones), but this is not always the case (I would guess that most conlangs were created for the real world). The most popular one is Esperanto, and I really like the concept of Toki Pona.

    So the idea here would be this: A job that consists of helping people create their own conlang. For example, you might want to have your own conlang just between you and your spouse, or between you and your friends, or you and your community. A conlang coach would help you in the process of creating it, learning it and practicing it.

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