Side effects of understanding that you are responsible for everything that happens to you. Maybe practicing it can completely change the world we live in.

Chances are that through life experience you already, even if only subconsciously, realize that you and only you alone are responsible for everything that you feel.

If that is the case then congratulate yourself, you are among the best placed to make the best out of life.

If you’re not among them and you find this intriguing, then try thinking about all those moments you think you are not responsible for what happens to you and try viewing them from a different perspective than the one you have today.

You may say, that you are not responsible for the noise your neighbors did last night partying, not allowing you to get some rest, or, even worse, that you’re not responsible for the fact that a drunk driver hit you and you are no longer able to use your legs. You may think how unique is your situation and how people should understand that you are not responsible, someone else : the neighbor, other driver, the weather, the moon, the stars alignment that second….fill in with any reason your brain can come up with to justify how you feel.

Because, you see, that is the thing, it is about how we feel, we perceive the world around us based on how it makes us feel and we record that in our memory by making causes and effects connections that will help us remember how to survive. That’s just how we function.

So going back to the examples, it may not have been your choice  that your neighbor threw that party but it is your choice on how you react to it. Chances are that it is not the noise as such that kept you awake all night but rather the fact that you were pissed off at your neighbor, started hating him, all your energy was focused on that sound the whole night and you may have even heard things more just because you put all your focus there. It WAS your choice to react that way and hence YOUR responsibility. To make things worse, your partner slept like a baby and when he/she wakes up he has no clue why you are all red with steams going out of your ears. The difference is your partner chose to put his energy and focus to something else, choosing  not to feel annoyed .

Ok ok but the drunk driver? I don’t choose to feel the pain? Well actually you might. You choose where to put your focus, focus on the suffering or focus on finding solutions to work around it and celebrate every success. It’s a choice and hence your  responsibility to live with it one way or another. To be very clear, assuming your own responsibility doesn’t take the responsibility  away for the drunk driver or the gravity of his actions and of the repercussions for him.

But you see, that is HIS responsibility to have.

Now, if you are not too hang up in your neuronal connections or you see that you are and you want to change, chances are you will have understood by now the point, i’ll go on anyway 😊(just to give you a chance to challenge my own cause and effect neuronal connections and potentially help me be less wrong).

We must understand that in any interaction there are two responsible people, me for what i can control/the choices i make and the other for what he can control/his choices. Scientists are saying we make more than 35,000 choices every day.

The key of success is, OBJECTIVELY, identifying what is your responsibility vs the other’s.

If/when you manage to do this (going  through trials and turbulences - don’t expect to be easy) and assume your responsibility, take that ownership, i believe that: